Friday, March 20, 2009
7:22 AM
today's training was so painful. for some reasons. it was hort but really really painful. i couldn't even do dips properly. that butterfly thingy was a killer, to death with those ac girls who came up with it. it was HORRIBLE! but i enjoyed todays training. i did nelo today for a little while and damn, it was friggin awesome. its like on planes you have first class and business class, the nelo is a friggin first class. awesome until cannot awesome already. it was a must to stop paddling at 630 pm cuz thats when the reservoir so-called closes. but we stayed there till like 7-ish. but we didn't go out onto the lanes. im doing k2 with del for mr-500 and i bloodly hell have to do well. today i saw my thrid rainbow of the month. amazing how it makes me feel better about all the shit that is going on around me, although just temporarily.

OGL OUTING AT SENTOSA WAS REALLY GREAT! although not all turned up we all had fun. dinner was different than we planned but with dave around anywhere will do. haha. he sure does lighten up the atmosphere. :) our trip to sentosa started off bad cuz i was so worried that we would have to leave the volleyball at the 2m deep dirty pond along the sidewalk cuz some genius called marcus dropped it in. and thank god there was a really long stick among the bushes. so we used that. i think someone else also dropped their balls in that so-called pond. okie that sentence structure is totally wrong but im not making any attempt to correct it. so yay, we got the volleyball out! what happens subsequently cannot be put into words but im sure we all had fun. thanks guys for planning it!

for the first tme i am uploading so many pictures. the perfect jumpshot was done at sentosa yesterday. it is just one of the many many many awesome pictures we took. with two pro photographers, emphasis on two, yeo mei and victor! kuek, i won't say you are pro yet. good try though. haha. the rest are from njcc really ugly pictures of me but whatever, i was genuinely happy :)








































i really gotta learn to let go. it hurts like mad but what to do. life is full of shit and i can onlymove on and deal with it and learn from my mistakes. although i don't know what is there for me to learn. sigh, im sure the next half of my life would be better. so many reasons why i should be happy but just one thing like this can kill all that happiness. if only you knew how painful this is. but then again, so what if you knew. it changes nothing. you are doing fine like nothing ever happened but im still wallowing in self pity. whining to people who are pretty sick and tired of hearing the same thing over. i know im strong. but come on even superman can bleed, what more me. i had both good and bad times the past 7 going n 18 years. but human nature allows me to only remember the bad. i know im gonna have a bad bad birthday this year. but whatever happened in 2008 is not gonna pull me down. if you can do it, so can i. 

the best i never had.



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HELLO EARTHLINGS! DENISE LOVES YOU. THATS ALL YOU HAVE TO KNOW :)
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